Friday, February 21, 2014

I am not just a One Trick Pony

Welcome to my new blog.  Now some of you may know me by my recipes on youtube and on but I am not just a one trick pony.  I have been writing short stories, and keeping a journal since I was in the 3rd grade.  See that little blond haired girl in the picture, that is me when I was 2 years old.  All sweet and kind but full of hell and you would never know by looking at that little chubby face but it all was about to change. Before I begin to tell you the main purpose for this blog I should explain that every day of my life is a sitcom.  I have two spirited children that are exactly like me in very different ways.  I will tell you all the escapades we go through here and try to keep it comical for your entertainment purposes. However I cannot begin to tell you our family story without first telling you all where it all began. You guessed it, me.  Now when I was little I was very sweet however I grew up.  I have had my share of experiences.  Nothing compares to the time I decided to take a greyhound bus to West Virginia, a place I have never been to meet someone I have never met.  All I can say is after that trip I do believe in God because I thank my lucky stars the person I went to meet was not a crazed lunatic.  I took the bus alone.  Now to some of you city dwellers this is no big deal.  However I grew up in a very small town where everyone knew everyone, and it was normal for the youth to be naive to the dangers that lurks outside our city limits. So because I believed all that people were good, I saw no problem being in my early twenties... traveling.... by bus..... alone.  This was going to be about a two to three day adventure for me and quite frankly it was.  I knew I was no longer in Kansas anymore when we had a 4 hour lay over in the New York City Port Authority and I saw a man pee in a trash can and come back to the same trash can and look through it.  After being on the bus for about a day I was hungry and thirsty and so very tired.  I saw a soda machine and wanted to buy myself a Snapple, however being hungry, tired and thirsty I didn't see the sign on the machine that said out of product.  The machine had no problems taking two dollars though and all to my embarrassment I see two men about my age, rather nice looking laughing their ever loving asses off at me.  Yeah I can laugh about it now but my face turned 50 shades of red that night.  When I finally made it to my destination it was relief for sure.  We had fun we went to the movies, had wings at a bar, and he was so thoughtful he let me buy him and his roommates groceries, a real catch he was.  However if that was the worst I could handle it.  After being there for about a week it was time to come home.  I was feeling like an experienced traveler at this point. It wasn't until we hit Maryland and this lady was sitting next to me and she was telling me how things like parenting has changed since she had her kids.  She told me many heart warming stories like the time her kids were fighting and she locked them in closets.  She proceeded to tell me back in those days you could do that and she did along with not feeding them when they were in trouble.  It was that moment when I thought to myself "self, you are better off just not saying a word, just smile and nod Heather, just smile and nod."  To this day that is how I get through uncomfortable situations, smiling and nodding, unless of course my husband pisses me off but that is for another day.  Needless to say I did make it back to my small town in one piece and that was the first time that I ever felt grateful for being from a small town. As I think back to that time in my life, I am scared because you know the curse that every mother puts on her children and my mother was no different, you know the one your mother always says to you when you have messed up.  " One day when you have kids I hope you have 2 just like you."  Yeah my mom is loving the fact that for her it has come true.  I am sure she always thought to herself too at the end of the day when I was in bed sleeping, its amazing I don't drink.  

Come back again for more twisted tales of life with Heather and her kids!

Thank you for stopping by:  Heather


  1. What a great story with which to kick off a new blog!

    Well, done, Simply!

  2. Thank you dumbass I appreciate the support.

  3. I LOVE this!!! I think this is so wonderful. I am very excited to get to hear some great stories about you. This already has me wanting more. Holy crap I don't get some people. You would think that common sense would be enough to tell you that locking your kids in a closet and not feeding them was not the best way to handle things. I don't care what year it is!! This is great!! Thanks so much for sharing this with me. I'm excited for more...

  4. Thank you so much Vag! Yes I agree with you about the common sense. I knew something was up when she told me that she was going to sit with me because I looked "safe." My creep alert when sky high at that moment. Thank you again for stopping by. Heather


    1. Thank you Dee, you can go to or Both are free services. I use blogger because its user friendly but wordpress is not that complicated either. You fill out their contact form, put in your email address and choose a layout that type of thing. Your layout or how your page looks you can change it any time. From there just start writing. Both are free services. Thank you for stopping by. Heather

  6. I can't believe you still remember me peeing in that trash can. I am so embarrassed.

  7. Dont be embarrassed, I just have a memory like an elephant. Chances are the New York City Port Authority changed the trash bag, after all its been about 16 years. They probably have some good shit in there by now.