Today I am going to be straight up 100 percent honest with you. After I had my youngest daughter, I had a very mild case of post postpartum depression. Right after she was born I had a hard time bonding with her. This only lasted for about week. However it scared the hell out of me. Made me feel like a terrible person and mother. Another thing that knocked me off my "mommy" pedestal was I couldn't breast feed her. My breasts just were not working and my milk never came in, hell my colostrum never came in. All of these things combined, made me feel less than anyone. I was jealous of the moms that never had an issue with either and never understood my plight. Moms in general have a very bad attitude towards other mothers who cannot do something that they take for granted is so easy for them. I felt like an outcast and I felt like I didn't deserve my daughter. I blamed myself for every thing, if she was fussy it was my fault, if she was crying it was my fault. Hell sometimes being so fucking tired of being up all night with her I would cry with her. After all there wasn't much else I could do. No one understood me, not even me. I heard the typical "how do you know you cannot breast feed if you don't try." Believe me I tried and failed many times nothing was working and my daughter needed to eat so formula was a God send. Yes I am not an uneducated prick that doesn't understand breast is best but I couldn't do it period. I am saying and admitting all things because its ok if you are in the same situation, you have to do what is best for you and baby, not what is right for the rest of the Goddamned world! I can promise you too all these mommy bitches out there that are trying to shame you, they don't feel so fucking perfect either. They are jumping on you to make themselves feel better because they can do what you cannot or what your body cannot. Do not let them catty bitches get to you! There are going to be times through raising your kids that these typical bitches are going to have opinions on your life and the life of your kids constantly. Your kids will do something that their kids may never do and I am here to tell you its ok! Kids are like fingerprints and they are each unique like fingerprints. No two kids from the same parents are alike. Its impossible. So even though your kid may be the last kid to learn how to walk, talk, or be potty trained, does not make you any less of a kick ass mother! Being a mother is tough, it would be so much better if as mothers we listened to one another instead of accuse one another. We try to help more and hurt less, we stop SHAMING other mothers for fuck's sake we are in this together! Isn't that what girl power is all about? As a side note who the fuck died and left this catty bitches in charge of the mother's self righteous group where everyone has to follow them or get off the fucking horse altogether! All I am saying is we need to be supportive to one another, raise either up instead of trying haul everyone down. I am here to tell you right now if your a new mom, hell even if you are not but still having some problems with your kids, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!! Speak up we are all not perfect but we do the best we can with what we have every day! A rough patch today will be a lesson learned tomorrow. Spilled milk today will be thrown out with tomorrow's trash. We will get through it, and I believe if we became more supportive and less judgmental of one another, it will make our journey less stressful and our relationships more meaningful. So if you know a struggling mom, offer her support even if it means just another set of ears to listen to. Sometimes that is all we need. We need to be part of the solution and less of the problem. With the statistics that show men don't live as long as women do, don't you think we should start the foundation with female friendships now? What we choose to see outside our windows is only as clean as our windows from which we see from. Talk to you tomorrow guys! Its amazing I don't drink.
Bailey when she was 1 day old
